Nano Update

Well, I fell off the wagon a few days this week, but find that when I sit down to write, I am pretty damn fast at cranking this stuff out. I am at 32475, i think. Plenty of time left to meet my goal, and I honestly think this is going to go over 50,000 words.

I am so glad that i started this. It has given me a confidence that I have not had before.

And now I am going to go out and have fun tonight with people from high school - Very strange! And not embarrassing at all that i blogged about wanting to have sex with one of them in the middle of homeroom! Or that his fiance is coming! Or that Natalie might wear some ridiculous ensemble involving a hooker heels, egged on by Carrie, with Camille laughing all the while. I am sure there is little chance of the Roswell Police being called on us.

I am sure i will feel wonderful in the morning, just in time to go to a cookout with more high school people! Go Creekers!

Facebook is weird.

Oh, and i have a date on Sunday. With Edward. He's very mature.

I Can't Believe . . .

That the little man starts real school tomorrow. He will be with his teacher and schoolmates just as long every day as the time he spends with me. I know that this is the moment where it all starts pulling apart at the seams, where his peers start to influence him, where he starts to come home learning new words and asking for a Wii, and dismissing Todd and me more and more. I'm so proud of him, and I know we are a positive influence on him, and he is more prepared than 90% of the other kids starting school tomorrow, but he isn't a number or a statistic; he is my baby.

A photo retrospective of the boy here.

November 11, 1989: Two Memories Converge, and Jason B., In All Probability, Shows Us the Depths of His Nerdiness

Kite Chronicles, aka "Mealby" put up a fond memory about an REM show in Macon and how she missed it. Here's where my memory picks up as hers was obviously drowned out by copious amounts of alcohol:

"Finishing where you left off, i went to this show with Jason and Evan. Evidently, my parents smoked crack while i was in high school and let me go to Macon and get a motel room with two guys for a show. We were also joined in said room by one of the Bells - matt or pat, weren't those their names? And another guy - Craig? Keith? Something like that.

Anyway, we went to the show, had a great time, and when we get to the motel, Va's car pulls up, the back door opens, and out spills Camille and Mike, completely blitzed out of their minds, giggling and barely able to stand, and Va gets out of her driver's door, looking SUPER PISSED.

From there, all i remember is laughing my ass off."

I made the show, but can't find the ticket stub. I know it's in the bottomless pit somewhere. Curiously, though, while looking through the pile for the homecoming pics in my earlier posts, i came across a ticket stub from two nights later:


The big question is: Jason B, where is the Macon lighter????! Picture please. It was red, right? Also, jason, since you are the resident nerd. Wasn't this Fox show the one where they played all of Murmur and all of Green from start to finish? Or am i confused?

Please Go to the Bathroom and Pee Before Reading This If You Went To High School With Me and You Have Incontinence Issues

Since we're talking about prom dresses and I'm still biding my time until the vampires return, I dug up some old dance pictures from high school.

I already posted the one from yesterday - That shimmering pink number was, in Natalie's expert opinion, not safe to wear due to flammability, but we all know I like to live risky.

As you can see, above on the right, I have a little ephemera problem. I keep everything. If you wrote it, drew it, or made it for me, i have it in a box somewhere. Just ask my husband, who married me and thereby inherited a staggering amount of . . . well, nothing. Notes from class in high school? I have them. Left me a note on my door or car in high school or college? I have it. Doodled me a picture? I have it. Played in a band that i went to see and for which there was a flyer? I might just have it. Ticket stubs? Got'em. I drank beer out of a champagne glass from my junior prom last night. Extra points to the person who guesses the theme. (Hint: The year was 1989.)

So, we'll start with Homecoming 1987: Crazy for You. Yep, Madonna, from the Vision Quest soundtrack, no less. Can't beat that with a stick. And I wore the shiny dress. Can't find the real pictures from that event, and honestly, i can't remember much about it, except going with David, and we rode with an older guy. It was my first "date in a car." We were not even out of my neighborhood before someone handed me a beer. I also remember thinking, "Oh, I'm not supposed to drink in cars. What do i do now?" But drink in a car, I did. And from there, we just know it was pretty much downhill. I don't remember going to the dance at all, but i do remember that night being the first night I ever went to Lon Feldman's basement. It was not the last time by a long shot.

Next up: Homecoming '88 - When It's Love. I can't make this shit up, people. If you are keeping score, that is one Madonna. One Van Halen.

I went with Shane Nugent. People called him "The Nuge." I did not call him that. Totally nice guy who was in my homeroom forever. (I was a "P" and he was an "N" - originally, they did homerooms by alphabet, and I was always between John Parker and Alison Peacock, which is how I came to be friends with the Homecoming Queen. After they changed the way they did homerooms, i was no longer with Parker and Peacock, but Shane and I were in homeroom together all four years of high school.) Anyway, I guess he asked me because he didn't have anyone else to go with - we never dated or anything. I hadn't been asked, so that worked out well. We went with Jeff Myers and I can't remember who his date was. We ate at the Italian place in Roswell that for some reason I am thinking Van Halen ate at once? No idea where that came from in my brain, but it is stuck in there, and it would be awesome if someone else remembered that and let me know i wasn't crazy. That is all i remember.

Oh, and I didn't totally hate my dress. Blue velvet, with bows on it. I didn't even hate the bows. Very small bows. Also, silver shoes. I always wanted silver shoes, ever since my mom had a pair in the 70s, and i used them for dress up.

Next: Homecoming 1989. I am pretty sure, based on the picture below, and the timeframe, that this was "In Your Eyes" themed. I went with SLP, just as friends, and it was fun. As mentioned in my comments for yesterday's post - he was an easy date. No love connection, just two friends who wanted to stay out late and get their drink on. I believe that this was the infamous "wallowing" night, wherein there were many love triangles, and a few of the jilted lovers, myself included, sat around in someone's unfinished basement (John Sabol's maybe? Cannot remember) and drank a lot and acted all unlovable and probably listened to The Smiths.

Again, not really an offensive dress. I cannot complain. Gotta love that tissue paper background. Scott looks nice, hair kinda big like i remembered.

This is the piece de resistance, though - Group photo, capturing all of us in our gangliness, all fresh-faced with the world in our hands. Or at least the Atlanta skyline. Obviously need to start with Natalie - She kept AquaNet in business. That is some big hair. John behind her. Me and Scott next to John. Next up, to Scott's right, are Brant and his date, who was a year younger than us, and for the life of me, i cannot remember her name. Leigh and Mike to their right. Then Matt and Stacy. Front row from left is John B. and I can't remember that girl's name either. Also a year younger than us. I remember her being nice. Camille and Duck. What the HELL is in Camille's hair? Is that a purple bow? Last, but not least, Doug and . . . Carla, maybe? Something that started with a C.
Now, this is a mess of crossed lovers right here. I totally had an ongoing crush on John ever since he moved from Oregon in 7th grade. I used to stare at him in Ms. Stone's class instead of paying attention to the Wrinkle In Time discussions, which is the only other memorable thing about 7th grade. Now, John and Natalie dated. I think at some point Nat fooled around with Brant, though. Brant and i had just had a recent fling, but then he met Leigh (Mike's date) and they were all about the young love. I think Mike liked Leigh, too, but really he was in love with Virginia. Not sure why they weren't together here. Now, I also had dated Matt the past spring, when we were Juniors, but we were still friends. I remember being at a party that fall and we were talking, i think in Mike's basement (this may have been the fabled "Decant" night, with the fish bottle) and evidently, Stacy's friends wanted him to ask Stacy out and they finally had to tell me to get lost, which is funny, so that Matt and S. could be alone. If I remember correctly, about this time, John B. also had a crush on me, but it was at the same time that I liked Brant. Well, Brant liked Leigh, but he and I were supposed to go see Hoodoo Gurus together, but then he finagled it so that I ended up going with John B., which was actually kinda fun, but i didn't like him that way. We had Waffle House on Holcomb Bridge after the show. He later wrote a story and dedicated it to me, and yes, I still have it, because, let's be honest, how often do you have a boy write you a story, especially one that is actually good? No idea what happened to him, but he was so nice. I guess Camille and Duck were dating? Camille, refresh my memory here. But maybe she had a crush on Mike? Doug and Carla were a "real couple" like John and Nat. No drama there, which is good, because now my brain is hurting.

I really want Nat, Scott, Mike, Matt, and Camille to pipe in with their memories of this night, because I am sure that there is some funny stuff I am forgetting. Pretty hysterical how much this picture jogged my memory of a lot of stuff I had forgotten.

And this is my senior Prom photo: I went with Jason. Jason, what was the theme? How did it feel to go to prom with Cruella DeVille? I don't know WHAT i was thinking. Am i wearing tan panty hose? That is one hideous dress. Jason, did you get a haircut before this? I think they forgot to cut the back.

Again, drama with the prom here. Jason and i were going as friends, but by this point, I was completely in luuuuuvvvv with Charlie. Charlie was going to prom with his ex, Kristi. Again, I really don't remember much about the dance (where was it? Downtown somewhere?) other than the fact that I just wanted to be with Charlie. Jason? I KNOW you will remember tons of other stuff.Okay, enough for today. Matt, I spared you (and myself) the pain of seeing us in the bigass white prom dress Junior year. You owe me.

Old Friend on the Net

So, Scotty P's on the internets now. He done moved to TX, got himself a long, tall woman, a pack of dogs, a gun collection, and a blog.

Check him out at The Austin Affair.

Time to Make the Pizza

I kind of thought that my brother-in-law was a really smart guy. He writes books about development languages and I think he is getting his PHd on the side, but i am not really sure, because he is modest and quiet and doesn't really talk about it. We would not have known he published the book if my sister-in-law didn't send us the Amazon link. Well, turns out that smart, shy, silent type brother-in-law also has a bit of a mean streak; He's not just a genius, he is an evil genius.
He's a Dogwood reader, and I guess he has seen the slew of nostalgic posts of late, and he decided to get in on the game. I give you to you, courtesy of my wonderful, brother-in-law:


I'm not really sure who these other people are, but sometimes there is a little collateral damage in the quest to humiliate family and friends. Life in the food web.

More Memory Lane

mikeM JohnS vw highschool paradigms 001
Originally uploaded by Dogwood Girl.

Okay, is there possibly a more pretentious band name than "The Paradigms?" I think not. I'm pretty sure that I didn't even know the definition of that word when these guys used it for the name of their band. But boy, it sounded cool!

Another gem dug up in Camille's basement. I'm guessing Chris Rank took this one, too. I like the way it's on a slant. I like the car, and the way that mike looks all squeaky-clean early 60s, while Johns looks laid back California. This is an anomaly, because John, for pretty much all of high school, wore only white tees.

I am pretty sure that I can't name one song of theirs, but I did hold onto a cassette up until about 2001, the sad day when we had a garage sale and I sold my entire cassette collection to the dude that worked the kitchen at the Flat Iron. i hope he is taking care of them.

Oh, yeah, and here is another picture of Mike, with that same late 50s, early 60s feel. This almost assuredly is a Battle of the Bands or somesuch.

Summertime Rolls

I think of that song every year about this time. It makes me think of the beach and graduating high school and looking forward to college and working at the pool for the summer. It makes me think of the rope swing on the hooch, and Dairy Queen. It is a song, for me, about possibility.

So, more and more, when this time of year comes around, I think back at how I felt so hopeful back then, and I remind myself that there is power in feeling that anticipation, and in taking on new tasks and hobbies and work and travel.

Which is good, because I am going to be working again, at least part-time, and I have to remind myself that while my dreams of wearing the kids out at the pool every day or dropping everything at a moment's notice to head to The Lake might not come to fruition, change is always good, and I always learn and grow from it. Meeting new people and learning new jobs is always a booster to my self-esteem, my mindset, and yeah, to the bank account.

And the pool stays open til 9, so I think I can get in some swims, no matter how much I am working.

Summertime Rolls. . . .

Heartwarming Milestone: Rollie's First Bottle of Robo!

Like those other milestones, "First trip to the Emergency Room," or "First Projectile Vomiting Episode," they are so precious. This morning, it was "First Call to Poison Control."

Rollie has a cold and cough. He often wakes up earlier than Todd and me, goes to the bathroom, and then plays in his room until the sun comes up. This morning, I could tell he wasn't feeling good, and he was coughing like crazy, so I made the call to keep him home from school. He was laying on the couch, watching The Flintstones, and just feeling puny. Yes, Mom, his eyes were peaked, too.

It was my turn to get up with the kids, so Todd woke up later and i heard him jump in the shower. Then he came down with the news that someone had gotten into the cough medicine. Now, any parent knows that kids freakin' love taking medicine. It always tastes like Cherry, Grape, or Bubblegum! It's the best! Yes, i realize that kids are not supposed to take the cold and cough medicines anymore, but we never cleaned the old ones out of the medicine cabinet. I mean, who knows? Next month, they might come out with a study that shows children's cough medicine prevents cancer.

We interrogated him for a few minutes, trying to find out how much he took. We had no idea how much was in the bottle in the first place (or how he managed to open a "childproof" bottle.) He kept repeating that he took "four." Four sips? Four chugs? Four teaspoons? Four cupfuls? Sure, his liver might be experiencing irreparable damage, or his heart might be about to explode out of his chest, or he might be about to slip into a coma at any moment, but I still want to throttle him for not being able to express to me exactly how much he took. Mother of the Year!

I got on the phone with the pediatrician's office. When you tell the doctor that your kid ingested poison or got into cough medicine, all you can think is that the nurse on the other end is thinking "why the hell do you still have that medicine in the house, and why weren't you watching your kid? Just another dumbass, crappy parent." They forwarded me to Poison Control. While I waited for them to answer, I looked at the bottle. There was no Tylenol in it. Phew. For Rollie's size, he should have a teaspoon. A cup of it is four teaspoons. 98 pound kids are supposed to get four teaspoons. Rollie only weighs 40 pounds.

Fuck. What the hell is Dextromothorphan.

This is obviously some kind of karmic ass-biting the world is bringing upon me for all the times we shoplifted Robotussin in high school and then drank the whole bottle. I was a terrible kid and now I am the worst mother in the world. What the hell made me think i could be a parent? Just to get it out of the way, I should admit that there was also shoplifting and sniffing of Scotchguard and whipped cream. Maybe a confession here will be considered proactive good karma and the universe won't require Tiller and Rollie to fulfill the "I hope you have one just like you" curse to its full potential.

Poison control guy gets on and asks me questions and then tells me to hold on while they crunch numbers. Seems like forever, and it is not encouraging that Georgia Poison Control is somehow affiliated with Grady Health Systems. I start Googling directions to Children's from the new house.

Guy gets back on the line, and tells me Rollie will be fine. He should not have any other meds today. Drink plenty of fluids. He might be extremely excitable, or really drowsy. (Come on, drowsy!) He is definitely acting a little odd (he called me Tiller and keeps babbling nonsense) and his pupils look like saucers, but he seems okay.

I am so relieved. You forget how much you love the little shits, because you get so tired of the endless questions, and constant chatter, and neverending requests, and the fights, and crying, and messes they make. But when you have ten minutes wondering if you'll be sitting in a hospital that day and if your little man is going to be okay, it puts it all into perspective. You think that sitting on the couch watching cartoons and cuddling with a sick, doped-up kid is pure heaven.

We are sitting here on the couch now, and he is definitely acting squirrely; he keeps repeating "I'm sorry, mama." And I keep telling him that it is okay, that mama and Daddy got mad at him because it scared them, and he just can't ever take medicine without us ever again. Then he says, "I'm sorry I took the medicine, mama." We have been repeating this about every ten minutes for the last hour. I am reminded of the time Mike M. fell off the skateboard and got a concussion. He had no memory of the accident.

He kept asking: "What happened?"
Us: "You have a concussion."
Mike: "How did I get it?"
Us: "You fell off a skateboard."
Mike: "Who the hell let me on a skateboard!!??"

(For those that don't know Mike, he is about 6'8" and should never have been on a skateboard in the first place.) He would seem happy with our answers, and then five minutes later, forgot them and we went through the whole thing again. This happened so many times that da Crease finally wrote "Concussion" and "Skateboard" on his arm and just told Mike to look at his arm when he asked what happened. Still cracks me up to think about it.

The upside to this Robo episode? Rollie is so out of it that I am able to make him watch cartoons I like, rather than the Dora and Diego crap that we usually would have to watch. Right now we are watching The Perils of Penelope Pitstop. He keeps telling me he loves this show. It is his favorite.

Oh, and his cough is gone.

Old Friends

Spent yesterday morning with my old friends Mike and Bryan and their families. Mike is an old high school friend, and Brian I met at Georgia. Mike has been living in the Netherlands for the past . . .four? years or so, but he and wife Kat and two boys are moving back to the states.

We met at Mike's sister's house, and another of his sisters (Mary) was there with her son, and it was just so fun to see my old friends and their wonderful wives and families (who read Dogwood Girl and are very accepting of my potty mouth. Thank God Mike's Mom doesn't read it, because I think she still hates me for not wearing shoes in her house in high school; DogwoodGirl might put her over the edge.) They even fed us and the kids. It was like a morning on vacation.

It is easy to lose touch with old friends, to never find the time to get together. But when you do get together, you find that many things have changed, and many things have stayed the same, and you are reminded of why you were friends with them in the first place. And you are warmed to know they are still in your life.

And also to find out that they will be living near the beach. The warm, warm beach.

p.s. Mike and Kat's blog is no longer Hollandsenieuwe; New locale, new name - Resident Aliens. Check'em out as they wade back into life in the states, and Kat searches for a position teaching Environmental Policy at the college level.

p.p.s. None of my pics of Bryan, Genia, and Henry came out well at all. Wah!

"The Stadium is Worse Than Bonkers!"

This is kind of a sad day for me as a Bulldog fan. Tonight is the first game in my lifetime that won't be called by Larry Munson.

This article is a good overview of his career, and includes some of his greatest calls. My first recollection of Larry calling a game was about 1984. I remember it like it was yesterday. I was twelve years old and it was a cold and rainy day in Georgia. I played soccer on Saturdays at the Roswell soccer fields. By high school, we would call these fields and their parking, just off the high school campus, "The Water Tower." As in, "meet me at the Water Tower," or the more exciting, "Fight at the Water Tower after school today." Good times. I think we were waiting for my game to begin, sitting in the warmth and dryness of mom's red station wagon. I'm not sure if Lisa was there, and I have no idea where Dad was, but Mom and I listened intently to Larry's voice on the radio as the cold rain poured down.

"So we'll try to kick one a hundred thousand miles. We're holding it on our own 49-and-a-half ... gonna try to kick it sixty yards plus a foot-and-a-half ... and Butler kicked a long one ... a long one ... Oh my God! Oh my God! ... The stadium is worse than bonkers!" - calling Kevin Butler's field goal in the final seconds to win over Clemson in 1984"

You would have to know my mom to have any idea of the response this elicited from her; Words cannot do it justice.

I know a man needs to settle down, but Larry will be missed.